Christmas can be one of the most challenging times of the year if you are in an unhappy marriage. With pressure to create perfect celebrations, navigate family expectations and maintain appearances, it is easy to feel overwhelmed. Experience shows that prioritising your own wellbeing is essential as it helps not only your own peace of mind but also helps to protect your emotional energy for your children or loved ones. But essentially, is a great survival tip for surviving December.
Choose moments for yourself
Even small breaks can make a huge difference. Step outside for a short walk, enjoy a quiet cup of tea or simply spend a few minutes reading or listening to music – put your headphones on. These moments of solitude allow you to recharge, regain perspective and approach challenging situations with a calmer mindset.
Honour your feelings
It’s completely normal to feel sadness, frustration or even anger during the holidays. Suppressing emotions only increases stress and tension. Recognising your feelings validates your experience and allows you to respond to difficult moments more thoughtfully.
Rely on supportive friends or family
Reach out to people who understand you and can provide comfort or distraction. Even brief conversations with a trusted friend or family member can help you feel grounded and supported.
Ignore unrealistic expectations
Despite what social media and advertisements would have us believe, there is no such thing as a “perfect” Christmas. Focus on what truly matters to you, whether that is quality time with children, a quiet evening of reflection or small meaningful traditions. Letting go of perfection reduces pressure and allows you to enjoy what is possible.
Set boundaries early
Be clear about what you can and cannot do. This might include how much time you spend with extended family, the tasks you take on or how you engage with your partner/ ex partner. Boundaries protect your mental and emotional wellbeing and reduce conflict.
Take care of your physical and mental health
Rest, nutrition and gentle exercise can help you manage stress. Small acts of self-care, like a hot bath, journaling, or meditation can actually create significant and instant emotional relief.
Make small joys a priority
Whether it’s music, a favourite film or food, small pleasures can restore a sense of balance and comfort.
Accept what you cannot change
You cannot control other people or every circumstance. Focus on what you can influence and let go of the rest.
Seek professional support if needed
Therapists can provide guidance, strategies and a safe space to process difficult emotions. If you think your marriage is beyond repair after the holiday season, solicitors can take that one step further.
Try to navigate the season with a focus on what truly matters to you. If this Christmas feels especially difficult or if the New Year feels like the right time to make a change, contact Claire O’Flinn for guidance on divorce and protecting your wellbeing.